The amusing thing is both me and my present bf ONLY dated younger for the most part when online dating. He said it was vanity on his part and I told him I did it'cause I could (get away with it). But asI've said numerous times on this site, I also was just competent to date younger (my normal taste except for my present same-age bf) cause I lied about my age. Shaved off quite several years too girls! Localsex in Waterford Australia. lol I was born in 1953, but wouldput 1960 or1961 on my profile. What helped is I have a killer figure (thin, but curves, 36D) and pretty face thanks to years of intermittant plastic surgery (but nothing below the waistline til recently (coolsculpting which I recommend). Myplastic surgeon's nurse says I job youthfulness and look, on a good day, in my 40s still. So, I Have had a clear edge. I guess I am one of the lucky ones, but I believe it is a combo of my character, a type of God luminescence"/spiritualityand looks. Men have always been brought to me in person. Big time. Occasionally it was flattering and occasionally a difficulty frankly.
I 've exactly the same observation. Andrew. For awhile I was amazed at women's profiles with their shopping list of demands (don't contact me if...you must be blah blah blah....""with no statement of what they have to offer. Certainly a man can collect much about a woman from reading her profile, and women are often so inundated with responses from inferior matches that they become exasperated and start to set borders; yet for me this language implies an attitude of entitlement and self absorption, and suggests perhaps an assumption that she's the more desired one in the deal. Maybe women are used to being pursued. A more considerate mature girl will understand that relationships aren't just about her and her needs. Clearly men can frequently behave the same way, just wanting sex. I consider the deeper truth is the fact that most folks merely blunder unconsciously into relationships, compelled by their poorly comprehended desires, understanding neither themselves or what they want from a connection.
Debby, you are talking rot as far as I am concerned. I am 62 and let me tell you, I've had nights" with women 20-30 years younger and they do not even ask what I do for a job. Certainly the long term prospects are not great with a considerably younger girl. But in my experience a great deal of much younger women go for me. They say I am a silver fox and handsome lol - Sorry, but as much as you'd like to believe it's about a cynical cash grab, I must inform you we mature men, like some elderly women bring the opposite sex. Unfortunately, many do not attract the opposite sex. nature is cruel.
Men over 45 do have more alternatives regarding dating. However there are certain ways around this. First, a woman has to expressly say what she offers a man (that he needs) in the context of dating and relationships. Localsex Near Me Bedford Western Australia. I've read thousands of female profiles (35-55 years old) and almost none of them actually state what they offer a man. Normally, itis a record of demands and preferences. This isn't great advertising. A woman must have the ability to answer the question What do I provide a guy he wants?" If she does not know, (or is offended by the question) she's not prepared for dating.
Kathleen, I'm an elderly man and many women on line in my age group make out they are not interested in the younger men. But of course they're. It's only that all the younger men approaching old women are mostly, looking for what they consider to be the quickest way to get easy sex. They only reveal interest in guys their own age when the supply of younger men dries up, or the men start to lose interest in them. it is insulting to me. And that's the reason why I'm not interested in the women, my age who approach me.
I get what you're saying. When my marriage fell apart a year ago people tried to reassure me that I was a catch. Localsex near me WA. And I still thing I should be - am tall, clean-cut, seem young for 48, run my own successful company, know the way to dance, am a community leader with environmental education and in my profession, lecture at university, write, from an exotic place (Alaska). As a result I am quite busy so online dating looked like the answer. But in fact in six I can count on one hand the number of women who have written back and no genuine dates. I picked women in my local date range and attractiveness range. Simply to check I wrote to quite mature women and not as attractive than myself. Nothing. Got on Tinder and swiped practically every woman. Tried all kinds of graphics. Nothing. while I speak to my female friends they say they're inundated. The sole dates I've had, 2, were from old friends who both told me they had been fantasising about me for years but then they left it at that and rarely return my calls. At Meetups women look interested but they don't answer. Simply don't comprehend this, it is as if they expect me to pursue them and I 'm reluctant to do that because the two times I did that when my marriage was souring forever alienated good pals. Really out to sea on all of this - so much has changed since I was last dating 26 years ago.
I feel like I am aging out" of online dating. I've discovered after my last birthday (I turned 54 in June) that the answer I get on has dropped to almost nothing. It's as though moving from the early 50s to the mid 50s is some kind of death-knell for a dating life. I initiate contact with guys in an age-range of about 3 years younger up to about 8 years older than myself. The potential matches the website sends me are age appropriate for me, but when I look at the age-range that those men want, (typically 35-50) I frequently move past them, understanding I can not compete with women in their desirable range, even though many of those men are as much as 5-8 years old than me! In other words, intentionally sends me matches which are likely not realistic for me to pursue. When I've emailed a few of those guys, I never hear back. I'm guessing they check out my profile, see my age, and likely read no further. Even if I'm within their desirable range, I still don't get much of a response. I assume the reason behind this is they can get younger women to react to them, so why would they go for me when they've a chance with the 45 year old version of me? If their first wife was their age, such as, for instance, a school honey or whatever, they probably feel entitled to a newer model, so to speak. Our culture supports this. It is frustrating, as well as depressing and more than a little humiliating. It's the built in folly of online sites: you're simply defined by your age, in bold type right next to your user name.
One more thing. I'd like to ask all of my middleaged online dating male and female compatriots a party favor. Please, let us rid our profiles of these overused phrases once and for all: glass-half-full, sensual, drama-free, and easygoing. Localsex Near Me Woodvale Western Australia. And these, let us omit these also: "I look 10 years younger than I am," "I loathe talking about myself, but..." and any and all derivatives of "my pals/mom/ex/children tell me that..I'm a glass-half-complete optimist, who's easy going and looks 10 years younger than I am." I think that if we can all really agree to clean up our profiles then maybe, just maybe, we can locate some common ground and get back to the business of falling in love (or at least having fun trying).
Cease Using Your Profile to Complain about Men. Several guys noted how many women's online dating profiles are included primarily of complaints about guys - either their profiles, or their conduct in general. I agree with the guys on this one. There is no point in using your profile narrative as a soapbox for your negative perception of all single, middle-aged men (for heaven's sakes make use of a blog for that). So while I'm sure there are men (and women) out there who are logged on and behaving badly, I believe that women must take responsibility for their own choices. We can maintain our positive expectations while at the exact same time heeding our inner voice that warns us when something is not quite appropriate. Much too frequently some women are led not by common sense, but by wishful thinking as well as a want to be nice and not seem ill-mannered, so we ignore the large, red flashing warning lights raging in our heads and continue without caution. I once met a woman who expressed great depression that she just couldn't trust the men she met online. She then proceeded to tell me a story about one of these men who spent days (yes, days) wooing her via email. He told her stories of his limitless prosperity and his links to powerful individuals all around the globe. She slept with him on the 2nd date (after he promised to whisk her away to a private island that next weekend). But that is not all. She also gave him all of her identifying information when he told her that she needed to be checked by "his people." And guess what? Yep! Her identity was stolen. Whining about how she could just no longer trust men she met online was a bit like whining about how she could merely no longer trust Nigerian princes. Localsex nearby Waterford.
Tone Down the Boudoir Photos. You say you desire a good man who respects you as a human being and is interested in having a serious relationship on you, then you post photos of yourself next to your bed (or on your own bed, or in your bed, or in somebody else's bed). And if you're not posting pictures of yourself next to your bed, (or on your bed, or in your bed), you are posting photographs with way too much cleavage. Now, that is totally excellent - I don't have any problem at all with this, and I am sure many guys don't have a problem either - but what some guys do have a problem with is when women post said super-sexy glamor pictures and then whine to their friends, or make statements on their profiles about how all guys are dogs and just need them for sex. And while we're on the subject of criticism-filled profiles...
Athletic and Toned Means, well, Athletic and Toned. I despise the body descriptors as much as you do (well, except for you size 0 women out there, you most likely love them), but I do believe it's significant that we at least strive for honesty. The word on the street is that far too many women out there in the online dating world are utilizing the "fit and toned" descriptor in reference to their "about average" bodies (this criticism applies to guys as well, of course). Localsex in Waterford, Western Australia. The thing is, there really is not anything wrong with having an around average (or curvy) body so let's take the pressure off ourselves and heed the advice of Amy Schuler, and understand once and for all that a little meat on our bones isn't going to kill us, and it isn't going to drive away the good guys either (right, good guys?).
No. More. Instagram. Photographs. I really like Instagram photographs because several of the filters make my eyes seem strikingly blue (or green, or lavender), and some even shave about ten years off my face. But do I post these photos on my online dating profile? No I do not. Why? Because my eyes aren't actually that blue (or green or lavender), and I'm about 10 years older than my Instagram photos would have you believe. This was the number one complaint among the men I interviewed - artistically filtered (i.e., delusory) photos. Truth in advertising ladies, truth in advertising.
Waaaay too Many Pet Pictures. This was a huge complaint among the guys I interviewed. They are taking a look at your profile to learn more about you, not your pets. Localsex in Waterford. So delete the pet pictures, especially the ones without you in them. Oh and while we are on the topic of pet photographs, I got a private request of all you single, middle-aged women out there on dating websites: please, please, please delete any and all photos of your cats. This is really significant. I can't emphasize it enough. Single, middle-aged women already must deal with far too many negative stereotypes, as well as the cat photos (you cuddling with your cats, you kissing your cats, multiple cats in your bed) only function to reinforce them. I once composed a blog post about how dating occasionally made me feel undesirable , and I got hundreds of opinions from single middle-aged men throughout all of North America notifying me that I must live in a dark flat with 100 or so cats, so actually, please delete them.